Podcast #26 – You are what you choose to be
First world problems are things you complain about when you perceive an absence of the more pressing concerns in life. First world problems are really existential problems. First world problems are invented problems that come from not having something more important to focus on.
The things you get mad about show your ceiling. If you had something more important to care about, then you would. But you obviously don’t because you’re too busy obsessing over pennies.
It’s like you’re running on a big hamster wheel, and every adversity is an opportunity to get off the struggle and nitpick over some insignificant thing. But even though it feels good to have a mini excuse, or a fake purpose to take your mind off the difficulty of the struggle, that ultimately becomes a trap that keeps you from moving onward in life and caring about something bigger.
So every time you have the opportunity to get off the ladder and have an emotion or feeling about something, ask yourself: “Is this where I want to put my tent up? Is this worthy of my time and energy? Is this what I want to be known for?”
It is ok to feel bad – Striving to remove all negative removes all growth stimulus
Four Basic emotions – happy, sad, afraid, and mad
3/4th of the basic emotions are not “positive” ones. So trying to remove those emotions is like trying to remove 75% of your life.. And these negative emotions are the exact emotions that enable happiness. Taking anti depressants is a good example – they may remove the anxiety and sadness, but they also remove the happiness. You’re not living anymore, you’re just existing.
Good/bad, happy/sad, light/dark, hot/cold – you can’t have one without the other. So instead of trying to remove the problems and pain, accept them and reframe them.
Wanting something positive is a negative experience
Accepting of a negative is a positive experience
Reframe your problems- Success is created through difficulty and problems. Difficult situations are always an opportunity to growth. Pressure is a privilege – It means you have the chance to step up
Gratitude is always in reach – Are you alive? Are you able bodied? Are your loved ones still alive? Did you have food yesterday? Did you have a place to sleep? Are you safe from physical harm??
You will be happier with less –
The best investment I made all last year was therapy because it showed me that I was causing my own problems. Not buying more stuff, not wanting things to be better all the time, not always feeling this engine running to do more, be more, and work harder. When I stepped back and realized that I have so much to be grateful for I was able to focus on creating and doing what I actually love.
The big difference was that I stopped wanting to be wealthy, healthy, and have a great marriage. I started doing it. I realized that none of those things would bring me a deep sense of joy, contentment, and fulfillment if I didn’t decide to already be joyful, content, and fulfilled.
Thoughts shape your decisions which shape your reality which shapes your future
You define success for yourself. It’s up to you to choose daily or not. At the end of the day, we all die. The hamster wheel goes nowhere, but the only way to live fulfilled is to stay on it. We all care about something, finding that something and running toward it is the struggle worth living, and that energy contributes to the rest of humanity by adding good into the world.
